Me & the Family

Me & the Family

Tuesday, January 19, 2010


The vortex, otherwise known as life.

Ever have one of those moments where you have been living in a downward spiral that you rationalized that it was for your own good?  Hopefully you had another moment that you realized that you were actually being irrational and you took you life back.

That is where I have been the past several months.
Taking back my life.

Finding me.

After working the past 14 years in offices I feel the need to just walk away.  I realize now that my talents and need for a steady income forced me into that arena of work but my level of unhappiness there has made me take a step back.  I have in turn put the ENTIRE responsibility of making an income completely onto my husband and have been reevaluating myself.

This week I am focusing on finding a part-time job.  I have been trying to pray about this job and let God lead the way.  I know what I do NOT want...but not sure exactly what I DO want.  

Many moons ago I was a daycare teacher and although that sounds really grimy and hard work it is something that I thoroughly enjoyed.  I loved "my kids" very much and looked forward to my job.  When I met my husband that is what I did and who I was.  He convinced me that my intelligence and abilities could shine and give greater financial stability in another job.  

So I left it.

My poor husband does not understand my disdain for working in another office now.  Such an abrupt change from the constant I have been.  I have had a few really good moments working in an office.  I developed two of the best friendships that I cherish more than anything!  Unfortunately the day-to-day stress that it carries is far greater then I ever realized.  

The Rat Race. 
The stress of leaving my family daily.
Coming home and putting on the mom hat.
The chef hat.
The maid hat.
The wife hat.

Every aspect of my life was being affected.

Stress is not the only factor though...

I have always been a creative person.  I like to work with my hands.  I love people.  I also love children.  I truly enjoy making others feel good about themselves and having that emotional connection with people.  For the past 14 years I have set all that aside and disconnected that part from myself.  I have put the desires and needs of my heart into a steel box and slid it onto the back shelf.

You see, overall, I am a simple woman.

For years I tried to be a complicated woman who needed to strive to become better and greater and stronger.

A professional plate juggler.  

I am not her.
I am me.

Father, what I ask of you is simple.  You know the desires and needs of my heart.  You know the financial needs of our family.  Please open my eyes and ears so that I may see the job you have waiting for me.  Thank you for already having the perfect one picked out! 


Now I am working on getting my husband's college stuff fixed.  He landed, I say landed, but I know that God plopped into his lap and AWESOME job!  He is trying to push through to finish up his AA and begin his Bachelors.  His sights and future have changed very drastically over the past few weeks and I know that it is completely a God thing.  

God things are just awesome.  :)

Even though he has longer in school then we had originally planned...when he leaves he will be a successful man who will be able to pay back his loans AND do God's work as well.

How cool is that?


Duke the Moose is still looking for his little lizard friends to return to him.  The cold weather that we have been having either killed all the lizards or sent them underground into extreme hibernation.  You get so used to seeing lizards that once you realize that they are no longer around it's kind of weird.

Are they gone for good?

Duke likes to eat the lizards.
...and frogs.


Tony's birthday is in a few days.  For 5 weeks I will have TWO 12 year olds.  After week 5 Maria will turn 13.  I am stepping over the threshold into the "official" teenage years.


So...what have you guys been up to?  
Any Earth changing, life changing events taking place in your neck of the woods?
Do you KNOW who you are and are you being true to yourself?

You know what to do....


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